Monday, October 06, 2008

Debating the Debates

November just can't come and go fast enough on election years you know? For me anyway. I get tired of it and I guess I get more frustrated that nothing ever changes no matter who gets elected. Personally, I think I should run the debates. I think I'd be a much better moderator than anyone else I can think of. Not just because I'm awesome, but because I think I'd make some changes. Just a few things I'd change.

1. The phrase "thank you for that question" is no longer allowed. You've only got two minutes so spare us the bullshit and give us a straight up answer. Ideally no one should elect you because you're a nice guy or because they think you're good looking. So this is your one shot to be no bullshit and give an answer like a human being instead of spewing your vominous hollow promises.

2. If you opt to go back to a previous question, you just forfeited your time. Candidates are given two minutes to answer something, then the opposing candidate is given 60 seconds for a response if their views are questioned. That's it. 60 seconds so make it count. No more of this "back to what I was saying earlier." If those words come out, we cut your mic and you're done.

3. Honesty. Yeah..that's hard for people running for President. But seriously, you wanna talk about change and how your administration is going to be better than the previous one, be specific. Sure it sounds a little like a high school project but we need to get back to some basic principles in the debates. Sure, it sounds good, but how does it work? Tell me...and remember no bullshit because you've only got two minutes.

4. Rumors. Yes, I think you should answer to any rumors, any of them, on the record. Take this one for example -


I couldn't tell you if this was true or not. But I think someone, namely the candidate in question, should answer this with yes or no. No grey areas. Furthermore, someone that admits to bombing the capital should not roam free. He should not be allowed to serve on political forums of any kind...but that's just me.

5. Finally -Introducing the fist fight. Yeah, I think people need to know that our President could kick ass if push came to shove. So, strap on the gloves, and step in to the squared circle. Don't worry, gloves will be inspected by both parties to make sure no one is packing anything they shouldn't be. Realistically you've been wanting to beat the shit out of your opponent because of the commercial his campaign made that you think slandered you. So, here is your chance. No points awarded here and no it doesn't mean you won. The rules of Fight Club will be observed.

2 Comments:

I'm all for Presidential Fight Club!!
posted by Blogger Eclectic E at 11:33 AM  
You DO NOT talk about the presidential fight club.

/Mike
posted by Anonymous Anonymous at 12:37 PM