Friday, September 23, 2005

Damn the USPS!!

This post made me feel a little better about a heated discussion I had with the USPS just yesterday afternoon. I ship books on occassions so I have to make trips to the post office. I hate the post office here because it's hard to get in and out of and the people as usual are useless. My first impression of this post office was "Can I use that pen you have to write this down while I'm standing here?" Her response "Sir, I can sell you this pen for $2.95, but I cannot loan it to you. If you'd like to write on that piece of paper with this pen I'll be happy to put $2.95 on your bill and you may use it. We are not authorized to give pens over the counter." That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. I told her she could keep the pen and I wouldn't buy a pack of them for $2.95 because that was insane. She didn't see it my way. Anyway, on to today's post. They've started to recognize me when I come in with stacks of books. The lady at the counter said "You know you can do this online right?" I thought "This is great! I don't have to drive down to this crappy parking lot and get waited on by these rejects that work this place!" How exciting would a day be if you didn't have to deal with USPS employees? Terribly. I assure you. So, they give me their online form and I come back and go to work. As it turns out, you can't ship media mail online. Seeing as I ship EVERYTHING media mail, I was disappointed and called the toll free number. My question was simple "Why can you not ship media mail online?" The girl had to put me on hold. I was on hold for two or three minutes when she came back and said (or read rather) the following:

"Dear Sir, we apologize for the inconvenience that you are having with our online Click and Ship program. Unfortunately the services you are requesting are not available online at this time. We appreciate your interest in the United States Postal Service and we'd be happy to locate a Post Office near you if you can provide us with your five digit zip code." Really, I think my response should have landed me in jail.

Me: "I know where the damn post office is lady! They told me I could ship media mail online. Do I have to have a special account to do that or what? Why did they send me to this online piece of garbage if they knew it wouldn't do what I wanted?" And I'm on hold again. A minute later she says "Sir, our United States Postal Service Facilities will be happy to help you with all of your mailing and shipping neads. Also for your convenience you can ship online 24 hours a day at USPS.com. Is there anything else I can assist you with today sir?"

Me: "NO! You haven't assisted me with a damn thing yet you incompetent fool!" She responded with a "Thank you for calling the United States Postal service," and she hung up. So I head back to the post office to ship my packages. The lady again asks me if I've heard of their clicknship program. I said "Sure I have, but you can't ship media mail online." She responds with a very harsh very rude "Media mail is subject to inspection and people that ship media mail are not trustworthy enough to ship medial mail online so the United States Postal Service make us bring people to the actual location so we can inform them that their packages are subject to inspection and that they can't get a better rate on media mail by shipping whatever it is they want you to send them. Can you understand that?" Of course I can. I can comprehend all of this because I'm a smart guy. Who is she to talk to me that way? So I tell her "You know I ship media mail three or four days a week. If you know that's all I'm shipping, why the hell did you send me to the clicknship crap only to know I'd be back in here?" She says she didn't know I shipped media mail, even though every package she had in her hand was stamed Media Mail - by her. So, I tried to calm down and she shook her head like I was the idiot here. So, what did I do? Did I take Jeff's advice and pick my battles? Did I go on thinking that she was wrong and leave it alone? Nope. I had to respond.

"Lady, you can stick your clicknship program in your fat incompetent ass for all I care. If you don't like dealing with people and feel the need to be demeaning and overly rude, perhaps you should ask them to find you a job in the back where you don't have to deal with people. I know the difference between media and priority mail, and I know it's subject to inspection because you tell me every freaking time I come in. I don't care how many of them you open, they're all going to be eligible for media mail. If you don't like waiting on me, I'll move to the next clerk and not worry with you but you'll not talk to me this way again." I grabbed my receipt and started to leave but decided to turn back and say "Oh, and have a USPS day ma'am!" She was horrified. Maybe I should lay off the caffine, but she just rubbed me the wrong way. Some days I just get sick of the incompetence and the inconsistency they have at the post office and I was at my limit. I'm sure one day I'll have a heart attack in line at a store like that and the clerk will go "I'm glad he's dead. I really am. He just came in and started yelling because I rolled my eyes and thought he was stupid. What gives?"

That's all for now...have a good weekend.

7 Comments:

Finally started a Blog on my own called,Vietnam in Pictures, since I never worked with Blogs it's a big deal for me. It's about kien hoa and similar subjects. I stopped at yours to get ideas for a layout. You did a Nice job ! ---Jack---
posted by Anonymous Anonymous at 7:02 PM  
I gave up on the USPS and went to Pitney Bowes for a meter. Then I could drop my packages with correct postage to the penny into the mailbox in front of our office.

After I found out what kind of shape our sales packets were in when they were delivered to our prospects, I went UPS.

And don't even think about shipping FedEx through Kinko's. Those guys are worse than the USPS.
posted by Anonymous Anonymous at 10:41 PM  
Bleh - I am on such an off with postal people right now I'm at a loss for words for you.
posted by Blogger Sprinkles at 2:14 AM  
Jack, I can't take credit for the layout. I had the idea but someone else put it to work.

Rob, Pitney Bowes has been calling me a lot lately at work. Their phone sales people are horrible so I've been hanging up on them. I might have to consider UPS if I can get a decent rate.

Insanity, your post made me realize I'm not crazy and the USPS really does suck. I'm fed up with them too, but what does one do?
posted by Blogger Raul Duke at 9:01 AM  
Another great post. I have not had issues with the USPS lately, but I know your pain. And they wonder why they are constantly losing business? Hummmm...customer support might be a good place to start.
posted by Blogger Christian D. at 12:19 PM  
Jack,

I hate you!

---Mike---
posted by Anonymous Anonymous at 12:22 PM  
YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE IT TOO!! Ahahahaa... i pay the extra 9 bucks so i can sit at the office and send it ups. psh.
posted by Anonymous Anonymous at 1:29 PM