Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Habib has been robbed...

So I get to work this morning and the lights are off at the convenience store next door. I thought this was odd because he's open all day long but I didn't see anything wrong so I didn't pay much attention. I open up and sit down at the computer to start pretending to work and Habib, the neighbor, comes in screaming and flailing his arms like he's on fire. I have no idea what is going on or what he's saying. All I got was that he needed to use the phone so I handed it to him. Then he starts asking me questions...in his native tongue. I can usually pick up spanish, but arab or hindi, or whatever this was is way beyond my scope. I finally had to say "Damnit Habib! Ask me a question in English if you want an answer! What the hell is wrong with you?!??" Then he tells me his store was robbed (I really hate that I can't do my impression of this conversation for you. I assure you it would be comical), and his neighbors store was robbed. Fortunately, we were not touched. So I asked him what he needed and he wanted to know how to get in touch with his neighbor. I don't know his neighbor hardly at all so I can't imagine why he'd think I have a number for him. He tells me that he tried both his cell phone and his home phone and didn't get an answer so he thought I'd have a different phone number besides his home or cell number. Maybe it's because he was in a panic but that sounded like a dumb question to me. I let that one slide. Normally that's not like me, but he did get robbed. So, he leaves to tend to the cops that have now shown up and found creative ways to use their barricade tape on his door. They won't let anyone in the building until they've conducted their investigation. To them, this is no big deal. To Habib, it's an hour that he's not in business, to the cops it's no big deal, to me it's another hour of Habib running in here screaming something in his native tongue. In case you were wondering I didn't pick it up then either. They're "Investigating" his store and he comes over again to use the phone and the fax. Normally I wouldn't mind, but he's still screaming and flailing his arms and I can't understand a word he said. I grabbed him by the shirt and said "Habib! What the hell do you need??!? If you need something you have to tell me in a language that I can understand!! How the hell can you be a US citizen with no better grasp than this on the English Language?!?!" Amazingly that calmed him down, he made his calls (I'm sure all the while mocking me to his friends in his own language) and about that time 200 more Habibs showed up in the parking lot so he left. Eventually his neighbor showed up and said he didn't answer his phone because he was on the golf course and didn't want to be bothered. He played Habib's cell phone message and it was all in Habib-speak. He just shook his head and said "This is what I heard on the golf course. I thought Habib was on fire." Amazingly for Habib, they only took a couple hundred dollars and no product. He should recover from that just fine. When I got back from lunch he was installing his new security system and playing with all of the sounds it can make. I thought it was going to brake the glass in this building it was so loud. Then he came over and asked if I could hear it. I just kept saying "Huh? What?" until he decided he wasn't speaking English and left. That's todays excitement.

3 Comments:

Damn you have an exciting neighborhood ad your new business. We need pictures of habibs store.

WHen you grabbed him by the shirt you probably scared him half to death! :)

How is the investigation going by the way (gas gouging)? I didn't realize that Habib was right across from where you work at.
posted by Blogger Chris D. at 3:39 PM  
That's a different Habib that was gas gouging...probably his cousin. I think grabbing him by the shirt got his attention. I live by the theory that you should really speak english if you're going to yell at someone...or live in this country.
posted by Blogger Raul Duke at 11:04 PM  
Habib-speak. I'm going to be chuckling over that one all day long.
Mike
posted by Anonymous Anonymous at 9:18 AM  

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