Thursday, February 02, 2006

Mohommad, the Tire Guy

My brother-in-law just got a Jeep that is in pretty bad need of tires. My father-in-law calls the other day and says he's found a used tire dealer right near the store that has a great deal on a set of tires. New readers and divas are probably asking why I'm the go to guy for tires and books. Simple. My last job was in the antique automotive industry and one of my main jobs was wheels and tires. I know more about tires than any three tire shop guys can tell you, and I know all their tricks they pull to suck you in to something you don't need. I (and my former co-workers of course) are a tire shops worst enemy. They hate it when people know the truth, and know what they're talking about, therefore when they feed me a line of bs and I call them on it, they hate me. So, my father-in-law asked me to go check this place out and see what kind of tires he was getting a price on and if they were a good deal. He said "Ask for Mohommad, tell him I sent you to look at my tires." I don't know too many 'Mohommad's' that own tire shops so I was expecting to see a service station with a Kwik-E-Mart attached to it. What I found was a used tire dealer, filled to the gills with Arabs. I don't mean that in a racist way, I mean I walked in the door, everyone behind the counter had on a head wrap - call that a rag if you'd like - a white robe, and the women had their faces covered. The guy in charged looked much like Yasser Arafat would have had he owned a tire shop...this guy was dressed like every picture of him I'd ever seen so that should give you a good mental picture of the place. It was wall to wall tires...used tires...take that were sent to be disposed of that he'd come in to possession of for free and was making a living off of it. After talking to him for a minute I'd already decided what to tell the in-laws about these tires. Then he starts telling me to "Listen, listen, listen," as he tells me everything I need to know about tires and tire sizes. I tried to be polite and say I knew what he was trying to explain but he insisted that I did not. I listened for a minute and said "Look Jihad, I used to work at (insert former employer here...they're that well known), I know about tires and wheels. I probably know more about them than everyone in this shop put together and what you're telling me is not correct. Not even a little bit." He turned white as the towel on his head. Then apologized profusely and said in his best Gandhi voice "Most of my customers don't know anything and that's how I make my living." We talked another minute and he offered to sell me anything I wanted at cost and he'd extend the deal to my in-laws that he could manage. At that point I had to ask..."Hey Mohommad? Who's my bitch?" He hung his head and agreed that he was. While I might own a bookstore, and I might wear my five o'clock shadows for days at a time, I'm not stupid. Outside of finishing up our returns for the semester not much else is happening here. If anybody else needs help with their friendly, or not so friendly neighborhood tire guy just let me know. That's what I'm here for.


LOL...If I was in the tire business...hell the automotive word I'd hate to see you coming. Now that I know you I'll be looking for advice on tires when the wife needs some new one's! :)

When I have to call in for problems with my DSL I let them go through their script and then I tell them I'm a techie as well and I've already tried everything that they want me to try. Usually that cuts through the BS and we get to the root of the problem.
posted by Blogger Chris D. at 4:23 PM  
I hate having to do anything car related. It's been my experience that men who own tire shops see a woman walk in the door and immediately start making up things that might potentially need to be "checked on".

I hate it. Which is why my inspection sticker still hasn't been updated. (It expired in October).
posted by Blogger Elle at 5:43 PM  
Yeah, that's why I take my hot wifes car to get new tires and I do any servicing or repair of it at home. Most mechanics are insanely annoying and I hate it when they pull their bs on people.

Christian - I know a little about why things don't work on computers so when I call Bellsouth to ask them why something isn't working I usually say something really nasty when they ask if the computer is on. I don't know everything, but I'm not an idiot.
posted by Blogger Raul Duke at 8:38 AM  
How is it that things like this always happen to you? Nothing that interesting ever happens to me; maybe it's because you say things I wouldn't have the nerve to say.
posted by Blogger Chas at 9:53 PM  
Maybe I bring it on myself...who knows.
posted by Blogger Raul Duke at 7:12 AM  
You do bring it on yourself...but that's ok. It is just who you are.
posted by Blogger Jen at 3:42 PM  
That's encouraging dear...thank you.
posted by Blogger Raul Duke at 12:07 PM  

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