Monday, February 25, 2008

Defining Uncomfortable

So uncomfortable is defined in the online dictionary as feeling mental discomfort, or providing and experiencing mental discomfort such as sitting in an uncomfortable chair. Well, Reverend Raul here has a different definition for you, but lets back up a few years.

My Freshman year in college I dated a girl that I'd had a crush on for a while. Oddly enough her parents grew up in the same small town that my mother did and our grandparents are to this day really good friends. We dated for probably a year and a half, give or take. Needless to say we broke up and for a long time I was pretty hateful towards her. Our grandparents still go to church together.

Fast forward to a couple years ago.

My wife and I were visiting my grandfather for perhaps his 75th birthday. I can't remember. That seems like too long ago, but it could be correct. Anyway, we usually go eat at a really shitty old peoples buffet in their home town. It's not quite as good as Ryans or anything like that so we usually just suffer through. At least it's a place where I don't feel insanely embarrassed that they don't tip the waitress. I know, they're old and I'm thankful that my grandparents are still here for me to have embarrassing stories. Anyway, here we are eating some seriously shitty food that consists of tater tots and macaroni that makes Kraft look like gourmet stuff, and minding our own business. Out of nowhere my ex girlfriends grandmother comes bounding over and hugging me and telling me how good it was to see her. I probably hadn't seen them in five or six years, but then I didn't really have a call to go visit ex girlfriends grandparents. So she's hugging me and I introduce her to my hot wife that is much hotter than my ex girlfriend. They take this opportunity to say "well, it looks like you're doing really well but we sure wish you'd married our granddaughter." Ouch. That was a kick in the face to my wife for sure. But they're old right? Wrong. They suck. They continue "You've probably never met her but our granddaughter is absolutely beautiful." Then they point to my wife and say "Don't take that the wrong way sugar, you're not bad looking, but our granddaughter is beautiful and we sure wanted this one for her but for some reason it just didn't work out." So there I was with my family, my hot wife, and several of my grandparents close friends...listening to two crazy old people tell me in front of my wife that they wish I'd married someone else. If ever, I've had an uncomfortable moment that has to be it.

So that's my definition of uncomfortable for this sunny Monday.


That's just strange...really strange.
posted by Blogger Chas at 7:13 PM  
OH NO, this is aweful. What did the hot wife have to say after this??
posted by Blogger Easy E at 10:09 AM  
Chas - it is...and it's all true.

Easy E - not much...what can you say? I mean, you either tell two senile old people to screw off or you just smile and say "that's nice."
posted by Blogger Raul Duke at 1:37 PM  
I have to say, that is pretty damn rude, yet amusing at the same time. You must have beating them with their own canes in your mind. Congratulations for enduring the whole situation without going to jail for assault with a deadly weapon.
Think of it more as me quoting Samuel L. Jackson from Pulp Fiction in my mind. "And I will strike down upon thee..."
posted by Blogger Raul Duke at 5:08 PM  

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