Monday, February 28, 2005

Movie Review and tips for wearing cologne.

Okay, so I took the hot wife to see Hitch this weekend. It was funny, a good date movie. I'm sure everyone that reads this has seen it so it's all old news. However, anyone that wanted my advice about it - I would highly reccomend you see it. It's funny and entertaining from start to finish.

We went to this new movie theater in town because it's nicer. The only drawback is the part of town is inconvenient to pretty much everything else. The amount of kids whose parents dropped them off at the theater is amazing these days. It's like parents will do whatever to find someone else to entertain their kids for three hours. I have one word for people like that - contraceptive. If you don't know what to do with them, don't have them. It's that simple. Anyway, I was standing in line to get a Coke when three kids who looked to be about 12 came up behind me in line. My eyes started watering because of the amount of cologne they were wearing. It's like they'd been marinating in it for days on end just for this specific night and you could see a cloud around them like Pigpen from Charlie Brown. Do these kids really think that smelling like this is going to get them laid?!?!? Let's be serious for a moment here guys. Girls just don't buy that you naturally smell like Cool Water Alpine frost - no one does. No amount of cologne is going to help you with the opposite sex no matter what the bottle says. If a girl says she likes the smell of it, wear less not more. Less makes her have to come closer to smell it. More will drive her and everyone else on the planet with a functioning nasal cavity away. You should all meet my smelly friend. He's a nice guy, but no sense of smell. For some reason that natural odor attracts women. A lot of people make fun of him for this, but I think he's got it figured out. He doesn't leave the house trying to fool people. It's either that or he's just given up altogether. At any rate, all you coming of age guys need to heed this warning for the good of moviegoers everywhere. If we can see the fog of your cologne rising off of you like steam, you've put on too much. Not only does it drive away the opposite sex, it makes people want to snort their ice cold carbonated beverage to get the smell out.


In regards to your comment about parents just dropping their kids off. I couldn't agree with you more. My wife just started working at one of the loca YMCA's. She has told me about parents who have dropped off their kids first thing in the morning and they don't pick them up until the Y closes. No money for lunch and after awhile their bound to get into trouble. So contraceptive is one solution, but how about liscensing people to have children or making them take a class or something. Some people are just so un-responsible and to add kids on top of it. I could go on and on, but I'll stop here!
posted by Blogger Chris D. at 1:28 PM  

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