Thursday, October 13, 2005

McDonalds and Ethnic Slurs

Well, it appears that the Senior Drive-Thru manager at McDonalds does not appreciate ethnic slurs. I know this, because I found out the hard way. I made the mistake of forgetting breakfast this morning and thought to myself that McDonalds would be alright because it's right near the store. The wait wasn't that long and when I got to the pick-up window the guy handed me two sausage biscuits and two hash browns...not what I ordered. So I politely (honestly, I was polite at this point) said "Sorry man, I ordered a number eight with an orange juice. This must be the next guy's order." Now, here stands Jose. No real grasp on the English language. No real grasp on how many fake gold teeth and gold chains are too many, and no real idea what I'm saying. So I hand him the bag back. He gets in to a discussion with the girl next to him, all while pointing at me. He leans back through the window and says (in his insanely thick spanish accent) "Hokay Ese, lemme yust get this rrrrrright. Ju have thrrree ashbrrrowns orrr yust two?" Now I've been sitting here for a few minutes and I really just wanted breakfast and orange juice so I could get to work. Simple right? Not with Captain Teeth at the helm. So I said "Seriously man, I just ordered a number eight with an orange juice. It's sitting right there on your counter." He had already poured the orange juice and never once considered that maybe they handed him the orders, out of order. Maybe the Senior Drive-Thru manager was a new position for him and he's watching costs. Obviously if they let someone get away with six ounces of crappy orange juice, they'd be out five or six cents, and I was clearly in his mind trying to get away with theiving orange juice. If you think about this, 1,000 people that steal orange juice from McDonalds could put them out $50. So, he smiles really big, perhaps trying to blind me with his gold teeth and says "No ese, ju yust dident orrder de orane yuice." Then he closed the window and started arguing with the girl next to him again. Not sure what this was about, but I was getting pissed. My short fuse was burning quickly. Then he took the time to set my order aside, continue to point at me while arguing to this girl next to him, and now he was pointing at the order that wasn't mine. So, I leaned out and knocked on the drive-thru window. Shocked he turned around and opened it. "Wassup ese?" I said "Just give me my damn order so I can get to work." He takes a second to adjust one of his gold chains and says "Okaiy main...but ju dident get de orane yuice. Yust de bizket and de ashbrrowns, si?" He had the bag in his hands so I reached out for it and said "Just give me the food you stupid f*ckin mexican. Stop f*ckin with your goofy ass gold chains, get your greasy head out of your greasy ass and give me the damn food. I don't care whose it is at this point, just give me something that resembles a damn biscuit Paco." So I grab my food, I'm sure in my anger threw out a few more ethnic slurs, and drove to work. I got here a few minutes late because of El Capitan, and found what I ordered in the bag. With a receipt that said "Number eight combo, with hash brown and 12 oz orange juice." I was so mad I think if I'd gone back to get my orange juice, Jose would have been picking the gold teeth out of his nose. Really, I don't have anger management issues. I took my seminar, and I passed. It's amazing how much physical violence you have to threaten an anger management seminar guy with before he'll sign your papers saying you passed.

5 Comments:

Been awhile since you've posted up one of these. I was starting to think that you were sick or something! :)

How's Habib doing?
posted by Blogger Chris D. at 2:03 PM  
Habib is good. I talked to him yesterday and he said he didn't lose anything really. They just cut his phone line. His neighbor lost a few bucks but no product.
posted by Blogger Raul Duke at 3:39 PM  
Holy freaky, you sound just like my husband! That is his gripe at every fast food restaurant we've been to here in "the capital of Mexico," as Larry the Cable Guy once said.

Makes me wonder if your wife has to talk you off the ledge as often as I have to with my husband before he pops off and bitch-slaps a drive-through person...
posted by Blogger Boonzie at 5:03 PM  
SPAM! Hee hee. And as irritated as I get at stupid fast food people I remember why they're there. All the smart people have real jobs.

Someone's got to do it. And at least he isn't drawing as much welfare.
posted by Blogger Jenn at 1:30 PM  
Thanks to a quick delete, the spam guy is no more. Hopefully he won't bookmark this page. If only I could meet people like this face to face.
posted by Blogger Raul Duke at 7:37 PM  

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