Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Five things...

These are five things that should immediately get you punched in the face with no recourse of any form.

1. "I just didn't see you. I was on my cell phone." Seriously. A lady ran me in to the ditch yesterday so I followed her to express my feelings on the matter and all she could say was "I just didn't see you because I couldn't turn to the left with my phone up to my face." I reached for the phone to stomp it in the ground but she withdrew it.

2. "Can you tell me what classes I'm in?" No. I can't. If you're that much of a retard that you can't locate your schedule, print a schedule, or obtain a copy of it in some way shape or form, you shouldn't be in college. This is among my frequently asked questions here at work.

3. In reference to some parts I'm selling online. "Is there a chance you'll take the new ones off and let me have those since you have a spare set? Then you can keep the old ones." Wow. I hadn't thought of buying new parts to give them away. This must be a new practice I'm not familiar with.

4. "No Habla Ingles." I don't think I have to elaborate much on this one. If you can't speak English and are working in this country, a very violent face punching should be in your future.

5. And the fifth and final one. Sales calls. They've taken to leaving us messages now. "Hi, this is Andy and I'm calling to offer you a fixed mortgage rate of .00005 percent for up to 30 years. If you can call me back at 1-770-555-5555 we'll get you set up." Seriously, if I was going to call you back I'm not paying for the call, and you have to pronounce my name right for me to even begin to consider it. Either way, if you're a sales call and you make the mistake of calling, then make the mistake of leaving me a message...you need to be punched in the face. Hard.

6 Comments:

Bad day?
posted by Blogger Jenn at 1:43 PM  
Not really. But a few violent and hard face punchings would have made it smoother.
posted by Blogger Raul Duke at 2:52 PM  
I've had those days myself...You just feel like putting fist to face with all the stupid people. Yes I know those days.

Didn't know that there was a new Bourne Movie coming out. We just watched the last 2 this last weekend.
posted by Blogger Christian D. at 10:17 PM  
I haven't had a sales call in so long. I have that privacy director on my phone; it's free, so I figured why not.
posted by Blogger Chastity at 12:32 AM  
We so need to get one of those.
posted by Blogger Raul Duke at 10:33 AM  
Call Bellsouth and have them add it to your package...I had them switch around my package and it actually ended up coming out a little cheaper.
posted by Blogger Chastity at 11:29 AM