30 and Grocery shopping...

Well, I turned 30 and it wasn't so bad. The wife had a big party planned and I grilled a few burgers for some friends. Cold Beer, Margaritas, and the occasional shots of rum and tequila mixed in with some board games and good times. The only real drawback is that now I can't say "I'm 29...not 30 yet." Other than my drivers license having our new address on it (yeah, it took me that long to update) not much has changed. Except for of course what you buy in the grocery store.

I have noticed that I look more at how much sodium and cholesterol is in everything we consider taking home. Most things that look good, and probably even taste really good, are usually so loaded with calories that eating them offers the same health benefits that living on bacon grease for a month offers you. My hot wife and I looked at some new breakfast bowls in the freezer section thinking they would be good. After reading the nutritional information and finding out they had only slightly less sodium than a 10lb tub of Morton Salt, she instructed me to put them back. It's no wonder we have an obesity problem in this country. People don't realize that some of these "meals" that don't fill them up are actually four servings and the entire thing has a gazillion calories. Anyway, it sucks to have to take notice and to not eat pizza nearly as often as you want...but I guess it's the price of living longer and not being a huge fat ass.

The other thing I can't seem to wrap my head around is vegetarian meat. Yes, that's an oxymoron all on it's own. Maybe everyones grocery store doesn't have this, but we live near a large vegetarian (Seventh Day Adventist) community so I guess the stores have to cater to them. Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking the vegetarian lifestyle...no wait...I am. Because they're cheaters! They're a bunch of non-committal grass eaters! At our store you will inevitably have to walk by the veggie aisle and you will find "beef substitutes," "soy beef," or some variation of the two. To me, this is cheating. You wanna give up meat, you don't get to eat stuff that tastes like it. If I give up beer, you won't see me drinking malt beverages or beer substitutes because it's frickin cheating! I think if they're really going to be vegetarian for religious reasons, that's respectable and I don't condemn that. If you're a fucking hippie and you think that you're making some stupid political statement by giving up meat because "vegetable proteins are better" or you think that farting cows are contributing to global warming, I hope you and I never meat...err...meet. Because I will inevitably try to feed you bacon disguised as a chocolate shake, or something else that looks innocent. Really people. Fake fucking beef? They have sausage, turkey, chicken, and beef substitutes on these aisles. And they all say "Tastes just like (insert meat here)!!!" No it doesn't! Do you know what tastes just like chicken?? CHICKEN!! Not some fake soy protein concoction of tree bark and recycled coke bottles that's pressed in to sheets that look like exotic drink coasters. Anyway, my wife and I discussed last night that I thought they were non committal assholes who should just give up and eat the real thing because they're only fooling themselves. She of course said that I was wrong which meant I had to put it on the blog. Because honestly, I don't think they should be allowed something that tastes just as bad as it looks (because unfortunately I have tried them) but calls itself a beef substitute. It's just wrong...on numerous levels.

That's todays rant. Hope everyone is doing well. This is the part where I tell you I promise I'm going to try to blog more but in the end I'll probably forget and let another two weeks go by before I blog again. So I hope everyone is well and I'll try my best to entertain you again soon.

Much too Young...

To feel this damn old. Actually, I'll be 30 this week so I guess I'm not that young anymore. Now I get to spend time off from work going to the doctor to get my cholesterol checked. For anyone that cares, I did manage to lower it by 22 points over the last three months so they tell me that's a good thing. Anyway...

So fencing pretty well kicks ass. I did get in trouble a couple times left week for getting too close and attempting to use my left hand to block and at one point I think I was actually going to punch the guy like they do in the movies. Not that I was mad at him, but it's hard to remember that your left hand goes back over your head and not in front as a defense. Oh well, maybe one day they'll give me two swords so I can be everybody. But, it is a fun way to spend time with my sister, and it's way more of a workout than you'd think so hopefully it will help me shed some of these unnecessary pounds I'm packing on at an unbelievable rate. Well, maybe not an unbelievable rate, it's just hard to lose weight once you turn 30 than I think it was when I was turning 20. So fencing is fun. My sister is having a good time and I'm going to enjoy beating her with a sword and calling it a sport.

Well, not much else here to report. We did paint the office at the house but I'll wait until it's fully decorated to post any pictures which hopefully will happen soon. Not much else happening but I'll check in later this week.

En Guard!

Hello friends! Another totally exciting Wednesday update for you. I apologize for the lack of posts, but the only rants I have right now (save for Alex Trebek) are political and honestly I don't want to alienate everyone based on my political views. Mostly because at the end of the day it doesn't matter what my views are or who shares them with me. Just important to have your own opinion right?

Anyway, tonight my sister and I are taking on a new fitness challenge. We start fencing! How cool is it that one can still learn to sword fight? I found this place online back in December and my sister and I have been talking about learning to sword fight ever since. I've sent e-mails to the people that run the local club and haven't gotten a single response. We finally just decided to go by and see if they were still active. Their first question was "Oh. Did you guys find us on that Google?" Not the most computer savvy, but that's okay. I've been looking for something to do lately that's outside of Crossfit. Just something else to help with general fitness and obviously the weight loss so I can be better fit my next 3o years. I was starting to doubt that it was or was not a good workout until we had a preliminary lesson last week. After a couple of minutes we were both worn out so hopefully this will go better than the idea of Thai Boxing did. Hmm...just realized I might have never mentioned that on the blog.

Ever since I decided to add something in addition to my daily Crossfit routine, I thought that Thai boxing would just be awesome. I knew that adding something else would mean another monthly fee and the wife and I talked about how much we were willing to spend on sport. Without thinking about it, I went and checked out the Thai Boxing place and thought it was cool. Who doesn't want to learn how to fight right? Or more importantly know how to beat someone in to submission should the occasion arrive. These guys wanted $85 a month for a one night a week class. Ouch! I guess we could have afforded it if I REALLY wanted to do it, but realistically that's just too much money for me to spend every month. I'd rather join a boxing academy somewhere, or buy a pair of instructional DVD's on how to box. Or just watch the training montage from Rocky Balboa...because who doesn't find that motivational?

At any rate, send us happy thoughts as we both learn to sword fight. If we're lucky, mom will get us swords for Christmas.